Loving Mary

So, we're totally in love with our little girl. I've always loved her, since the first kick in my belly. But it's taken me a while to like her too. A friend told me a story once that she'd heard from a lady, lets call her Jean, at her church. Well Jean's husband had an affair with another woman. Since Jean doesn't believe in divorce she decided to forgive her husband and remain married to him. She forgave, but it was still hard for her to truly love him again. One day Jean realized that God still loves her husband far more than she ever did in the first place, so she told God that she could not love her husband and asked Him to love her husband through her.

This made me think about Mary. Of course it's very different. Mary never committed any crime, unless 9 hours of crying counts ;) But when I heard that story I just remembered that God loves Mary far more than Ian and I can ever hope to love her. So I asked God to love Mary through me. To help me take care of her when I didn't feel like dragging my butt out of bed in the middle of the night, or during the 4th hour of crying every night. I tried to remember what Jesus says in Matthew 19, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

I have to give credit where it's due...God's totally brought me through that time and has given me the ability to feel love for her as opposed to just choosing to love her. When she takes a really long nap I start to miss her and just want her to wake up so we can play. When I feed her, sometimes she looks up and stares at me. I love to look at her and stare into her eyes that remind me of her daddy. I didn't know it was possible for something to be THIS beautiful. Those are my thoughts for the day!!